Written by: Hannah Schlueter, MA, LAC
Before we talk about developing your personal values, let’s first talk about what values are. Values are what you believe to be important in life. They consist of your own central beliefs and principles that you use to move through life. Your values act as the guide for your morality, decision-making, aspirations, and relationships. Identifying your personal values is important because of the impact it has on your behavior, goals, and overall well-being. Acting in alignment with your values leads to more satisfaction and fulfillment, and acting in ways that don’t align with your values can create a lot of conflict in your life. Personal values also create space to recognize your priorities in life, which helps you choose the best direction for you, your future, and your own life goals.
Often times, the development of your personal values starts with your family. While personal values are pretty stable, they may change as you grow up and encounter different experiences. Personal values can also come from personal growth or from other people in your life, such as friends. As a teen, you are in a prime stage for the exploration and development of your own value system. This process starts with looking at what’s important to you, even if it doesn’t match those of people around you. Your values will help you through successful and challenging times, so having clarity around your value system leads to more confidence and self-respect around the choices you make.
Another way to develop your personal values is to reflect on your life experiences. Think about when you were the happiest, when you were the proudest, and when you were the most fulfilled with your life. Identifying what made those experiences meaningful to you can help you recognize some of your values. The next step in developing your personal values is to prioritize your top values. This step can be quite tough, as some situations might require you to choose between decisions that reflect two different values. For example, let’s say that two of your personal values are loyalty and honesty. If a friend asks you to lie for them, you have to decide between maintaining your value of loyalty to your friend by lying for them or maintaining your value of honesty by telling the truth. What you choose to do reflects what you value more, and your values are often strengthened after being challenged.
Your values are a central part of you who are and who you want to be. Developing your personal values helps you feel purposeful in your actions and decisions, so it’s crucial to be aware of your personal values and rely on them to guide you to the best choice in any situation.
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Hannah Schlueter is a Licensed Associate Counselor (LAC) who provides therapeutic services at Evolve Counseling. Hannah specializes in working with teens and enjoys helping them navigate anxiety, depression, identity struggles, self-esteem, and relationships. Hannah has a passion for helping teens overcome their challenges and empower them to grow and improve their overall well-being.